Thanks for sharing. No, really...thanks for sharing.
My boss made a statement to me a few years ago when I was whining about having to clean up someone else's crap. He said, "Do you think it is right to make the your problems the problems of others?" Phuck. How do you answer that? Really.
Since that day, when confronted with an issue I should much rather avoid, I will use that question as my litmus test to see if I am making the right decision. When is it appropriate for one to dump his problems on someone else? When does it cross the lines of decency in any relationship (work, friend, romantic or any other)?
Perhaps now is the time where I state, for the record, I am not mad. I am not upset. I am not frustrated. I am, however, a little confused, having an enormous load dropped in my lap. And...having no one to speak to about this load.
No need for details, really. They are actually quite boring an unnecessary. They are, however, keeping me awake at night now.
So...for the sake of the game, when you are fed information what do you do with it? Sometimes, the challenge lies solely in the digestion process, ensuring that you fully comprehend what has been shared with you. Sometimes, you can handle the situation without having to seek counsel of a friend, peer or authority figure. Sometimes, you cannot.
I find myself in the, "sometimes, you cannot" scenario. It sucks.
What does one do, upon learning a friend is in need, a friend is dealing with a struggle for their daily existence and you find yourself on the outside looking in? A request for my assistance had been made. The door, however, had been abruptly shut. Someone made their problems my problems. Any normal, rational person would say either get really angry or take the position of, "phuck off." I am not normal. I cannot do that.
So here I sit, at 04:08 on a Thursday morning, trying to develop my next action. The only thing I can really do is patiently await an outcome and accept it for whatever it will be. It's saddening, frustrating, disheartening and exhausting.
I suppose the only thing I can do is remember that statement from my boss and try to mold that into some form which I can handle. Someone else's problem has now become mine and I am helpless.
Then again, there is always the super-duper, handy-dandy denial box where I tuck away all of life's little annoyances and/or goat phucks which cannot or should not be presently addressed.
Since that day, when confronted with an issue I should much rather avoid, I will use that question as my litmus test to see if I am making the right decision. When is it appropriate for one to dump his problems on someone else? When does it cross the lines of decency in any relationship (work, friend, romantic or any other)?
Perhaps now is the time where I state, for the record, I am not mad. I am not upset. I am not frustrated. I am, however, a little confused, having an enormous load dropped in my lap. And...having no one to speak to about this load.
No need for details, really. They are actually quite boring an unnecessary. They are, however, keeping me awake at night now.
So...for the sake of the game, when you are fed information what do you do with it? Sometimes, the challenge lies solely in the digestion process, ensuring that you fully comprehend what has been shared with you. Sometimes, you can handle the situation without having to seek counsel of a friend, peer or authority figure. Sometimes, you cannot.
I find myself in the, "sometimes, you cannot" scenario. It sucks.
What does one do, upon learning a friend is in need, a friend is dealing with a struggle for their daily existence and you find yourself on the outside looking in? A request for my assistance had been made. The door, however, had been abruptly shut. Someone made their problems my problems. Any normal, rational person would say either get really angry or take the position of, "phuck off." I am not normal. I cannot do that.
So here I sit, at 04:08 on a Thursday morning, trying to develop my next action. The only thing I can really do is patiently await an outcome and accept it for whatever it will be. It's saddening, frustrating, disheartening and exhausting.
I suppose the only thing I can do is remember that statement from my boss and try to mold that into some form which I can handle. Someone else's problem has now become mine and I am helpless.
Then again, there is always the super-duper, handy-dandy denial box where I tuck away all of life's little annoyances and/or goat phucks which cannot or should not be presently addressed.
Labels: Observations, Personal, Rants
posted by High Priestess Kang @ 9/14/2006 02:59:00 AM
2 Comments
2 Comments:
And sometimes, dahhhlin', people are just passing the buck and the biggest favor you can do is drop their load right back in their lap with a big, steaming side of "it's your mess, you made it, now you clean it up."
There are people that need support and there are people that want to evade taking responsibility. It's easy to be a friend to the first, but the best friend you can be to the second is the one that doesn't let them off the hook. People don't always want what they need.
And nowhere is it written that there is always another chance.
*hugs and heartiez <3*
It is most liberating to be able to walk away without feelings of obligation and responsibility. This is one of those instances where the more distant the pain becomes, the more I realize my inner strength and fortitude. It is odd when you come out on the winning side of a situation that seemed so entirely bleak.
Hugs and hartiez!
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