Self-Defense...Cyber Style

It should not come as a surprise to anyone that there is a dark side of the internet. I'm not talking about the seedier websites extolling the virtues of pornography, racism and other things that make the average bear's stomach churn. I'm talking about cyber-stalking.

As some of you may be aware, I had the distinct pleasure of being "trolled" or harassed by three different people in the course of six weeks. While it was horrible to endure, reflection has given me a different perspective. Yes, I was threatened. Yes, I had my words distorted by two people and aired on a public forum (while I was sleeping and thusly incapable of taking any action). Some people took advantage of some personal information they were privvy to and used it in an attempt to embarrass me. By the grace of G-d, it only made them look foolish. Oh...and subsequently resulted in their being banned from accessing certain websites. All that said, the hell was real to me. It changed the way I utilize the internet. It taught me a lesson that I needed to learn. In the end, I'm smarter for it.

I was lucky.

Last week, the younger sister of one of my gal-pals received a death threat through a very popular website among teens and musicians. Imagine, being 17 years old and receiving a death threat via the internet. Fortunately, the harassed was able to identify her stalker and called the police. The police arrested him and he was treated to a night in the pokey before bonding out. Justice will be served, but how do you tell a 17 year old girl that everything is going to be fine?

Another one of my friends is being harassed and threatened, as well. All of this should be enough to make one turn off their computer and never play on the internet again.

Even though most of us are accessing the interweb from the safety of our homes, offices, dorm rooms or libraries, we are not safe. We are no safer than we would be walking down a street in a large city at night. People need to keep their wits about them and maintain a defensive posture to keep from being harmed. It is a sad reality. My father raised me to be street smart and urban savvy. I am going to have to raise my children to be street smart, urban savvy and web wise.

People need to understand that there are ways to protect yourself. There are ways to report abuse if you ever find yourself on the receiving end of it. Should you ever receive anything remotely threatening, report it to the origin ISP immediately. You need to start a paper trail, you need documentation to show that this behaviour is menacing and on-going should it not cease. Take screenshots of everything. This will help your case should you need to bring it to the attention of police.

WiredSafety.org is a wonderful resource, as well.

A friend of mine is working on a woman's guide to self-defense on the internet. Once she has finished, I will post a link and several articles. If you stumble upon this blog post before that project is completed and need help, please leave a comment and I will do my best to accommodate any request.

As I said above, I was lucky. I was terrorized, but it was only a mild inconvenience on the grander scale of stalking. I am blessed to have been surrounded by people who care enough to have taken action to protect me. Let my cautionary tale, and those of others I mentioned, serve as a warning that one is not safe enough on the internet.